Stanbrooke Today
May my epitaph read:  "He loved kids"

2021 Senior Roast

Well, another year has passed us by

   And what a year it's been

Not like any thought it would be

   When we were starting in.

It's been a year to be remembered

   By all who lived the time

There's covid, ice and winter chill

   But we all survived and seem quite fine.

Forever, you will all remember

   And will be known for as well

As the class that survived and maybe even thrived

   During this little taste of hell.

But we all made it and we're ready

   To say our last good-bye

All will say, "we'll keep in touch"

   But know deep down that's a lie.

So savor your last times together

   And maybe laugh a little, too

All this is meant to be in fun

   But, of course, too much of it is true.

But know that I do love thisclass

   And wll miss so many, as I've said,

So do stop by a time or two

   During your rush to life ahead.

This class will long be remembered

   For all you've done and all you've been

For good times and some not so good

   For when you'd lose and when you'd win.

Lots of drama this special year

   Lots of learning, lots of dumbing

Lots of things to hold our attention

   Lots of shots done at Homecoming.

Hayden Halm

Halm is known for many things

   And will be remembered for a lot

Not the least is answering every question

   Whether he knows the answer or not.

He's tried for almost every girt

   Or so it would sure seem

And, in doing so, he's struck out

   More times than our baseball team.

He and Erica did have a fling

   Even Danae for bit

But when he couldn't keep them his own age

   He moved on to Noelle - guess she was all he could get.

Halm got an offer the other day

   Maybe the best he'll ever get

From the Sarah Desert...they don't want him -

   They just want his sweat.

We think we've discovered what makes Hayden sweat

   And we'll try to get it banned

He only sweats when he sees Darnell headed toward him

   With a razor in his hand.

Brandon Buchanan

Brandon used to like Tanna, it is said

   But it got pretty grim

Ended when he took her out to eat and tried to steal her french fry

   And she bared her teeth and growled at him.

Brandon went with Shaelyn to Homecoming one time

   Guess that went on apace

'course that was back in time

   When he could actually see her face.

Danae Wenger 

Wenger has latched onto Pryor

   That's certainly a fact.

At least it's somewhat better than...

   Last summer with Brandon Black.

Danae may be the only one someday

   To have an an answer when recalling strife

And asked if there ever was

   A "Black Period" in her life.

She even had flings with Blake

   And Mikey in her time

After those two in her past

   Pryor must look real fine.

She does have a track record 'round these parts

   At least seems to be her trends

She seems to get her kicks out of

   Trying to steal other girl's boyfriends.

Jase Branch

Jase drooled over Erica for quite some time

   Not a pretty sight

But, alas, they broke up for sure

   Things just didn't seem quite right.

There seemed a time with Nina dear

   But that didn't seem to last

But Nina got some homework done

   So, it wasn't a total pass.

So Jase is back to bachelor days

   Not pining for what's gone

He'll just spend another day

   Leading Jessi on.

But that seems to be Jase's way to be

   Way he gets his joys

Seems to be to chase after girls

   Dating other boys.

Rumor has he even tried

   To have someone write his speech

As if do something that difficult

   Was not within his reach.

Nina Novick

First Nina's her and then she's gone

   Then she's back for daily grind

Which boy she's with for this particular day

   Well...that might be hard to find.

She started out with Blaine so true

   Led him around like a puppy dog

Lasted longer than any thought it would

   But, now filed in her "has been" log.

So, on to Jase our Nina went

   Poor boy never had a chance

Only question was:  was she interested in him doing her homework

   Or in having a true romance.

But, we guess Nina's free again

   At least it seemed at prom

Seemed to hover over every boy

   And even grabbed a homeless man walking by when things got too calm.

Erica McCraw

Erica was with Jase for quite some time

   But, alas, that was not to be

So she latched on to the first boy she could find

   Who looked at her long and hard....and ran off and joined the army.

But no big problem for our Erica

   At least from our viewpoint

Fathfullness to her current boyfriend

   Has never been her strongest point.

She even dated Blaine for awhile

   Before letting Nina take his hand

So, she's tried a few boys in her time

   Just never found one she could land.

But Erica's a good student and certainly

   Is nobody's fool.

She does well...except on days she and Nina

   Are too hung over to drive to school.

Shaylen Brooke

Shaylen's ranked at the top of all

   No one matched her gpa

Nor her record of wearing 13 masks

   At the same time, on the same day.

Can't wait for her wedding day

   "Kiss the bride", the pastor tips

Poor groom, it'll take him half an hour

   Just to find her lips.

Should you ever see Shaylen screaming down the hall

   Don't dare try to save her

It's probably just that she got a 99

   On her latest paper.

But, Shaylen's on top of things, or so we think

   But there are times she is a bit squirrely

Last week she ask what the first scripture would be for next year

   So she could be sure and say it early.

Matthew Hindman

Matt likes to stay around

   And play basketball at Lion Time

And trample spirits of little Freshmen boys

   Just to show he can...and that's fine.

We won't say he has a temper

   But at times he does and more

Last week he got mad and stomped a June Bug

   Just for crawling 'cross the floor.

He began looking for a girl

   Found one and seems quite pleased

Actually, he just started through the alphabet

   But only knows to "Dee's"

Tanna Morquecho

Morquecho growls at everybody

   Her attitude is pretty sorry

But, pay no mind, just understand

   She's still pining away for Arnie.

But Tanna helped her team to another

   State title to be fair

All her dreams answered except for one

   If only Arnie could have been there.

Dakota Drier

Dakota-what can we really say

   That isn't widely known

Especially that he appears to be

   In love with Post Malone.

He's another non driver here

   But before you feel too low

Just think what it might be like

   If he were on the road.

Test days are always a challenge

   Try as I might to gage

If Dakota is going to finish his test

   Before I die of old age.

Savion Darnell

Darnell has many talents 'tis a fact

   Never know which one he pegs

But most troublesome might just be

   When he decided to shave his legs.

Prom came around and he shaved his sticks

   Was he looking for romance

Or just getting ready for a date

   To a gay pride dance?

Savion has no driver's license

   So, hard to pick up dates these days

So, maybe we can all sympathize...

   Why he just sits home and shaves.

But, some day he'll be a great artist

   Know that is you care

He may even advance to shaving

   Portraits in his leg hair.

He did date Noelle for awhile

   But broke up in spitte of all his begs

Seems in spite of all he could do

   She wouldn't let him shave her legs.

Darnell heads to Walmart every day

   As soon as he's out of school

We know why, it's because he thinks being a Walmart greeter

   Would be so very, very cool.

Dylan Ware

Dylan had a fling with Nina

   But he's not unique there, for sure

Now he's got to find aother

   Not any pickier than her.

His boyish smile and wavy hair

   Should draw girls as they pass

But, alas, they seem to get to know him

   And run away real fast.

He's go after Erica as his girl

  That's pretty much for sure

If it weren't for the fact he'd have to carry

   A step ladder around to kiss her.

Lauren Canelos

Class has begun and teaching's going good -

   Well after 9 by the clock on the wall

When suddenly the door swings open...

   Lauren has decided to join us after all.

Used to wonder where she was

   To be late end after end

Found out she was at the daycare

   Scouting for her next boyfriend.

The only thing that might pull her off

   The little ones and all

Might be if Chris Evans got really desparate 

   And somehow gave her a call.

But she's a leader we all know

   Why just this week she showed she had 'em

And let you all wear jeans to school...

   Quite a surprise to Mrs. Adams.

Rumor has when prom night came

   And announcements were heard and seen

She and Nina got together and cried

   When they weren't named prom queen.

But, it was not to be this night

   Never could have been seen

They're just lucky with his shaved legs

   Savion didn't win both Prom King and Queen.

Most Likely To...

Spend 3 hours in Walmart searching for after shave for legs....Savion Darnell

Be standing at the altar on her wedding day, look at the groom and ask, "Now, what's your name again?"....Nina Novick

Still be thinkng about Arnie no matter who she marries...Tanna Morquecho

To marry a man she's never kissed since she won's take her mask off...Shaelyn Brooks

To be drunk at her wedding...Erica McCraw

Second most likely to be drunk at their wedding...whoever marries Erica

Make the flower girl at her wedding cry because she growled at her...Tanna Morquecho

Be late to her own wedding...Lauren Canelos

Be still playing video games 10 minutes after he dies and not be aware he's dead...Brandon Buchanan

To have to carry a diaper bag for her groom at her wedding...Lauren Canelos

Die, go to hell and have the devil kick him out saying:  "We don't need your kind of attitude around here!"...Matthew Hindman


Tanna Morquecho.......makes pit bulls run away by growling at them

Hayden Halm.......doesn't do anything, just stands there and sweats

Lauren Canelos.....doesn't do anything either but is late doing it.

Nina Novick.....all the boy dolls run for cover.

Savion Darnell.....goes up to the nearest boy doll and asks, "Want me to shave your legs?"

Lauren Canelos... goes up to a 5 year old boy and says, "Hi there, big boy.  Wanna go on a date?"

Tanna Morquecho.......strikes you out and growls at you on the way back to the dugout.

Erica McCraw......gets arrested for drunk driving on the way to school.

Dakota Drier......can't really tell whether you did it or not.

Matthew Hindman.....wins state championship in high jump and gets mad because the pit wasn't soft enough.

Savior Darnell.....throws a little hissy fit about something until it runs down and you never make the mistake of winding it up again.